Until about six years ago, I treated my menstrual cycle synonymously with my period. The only thing I was keen to align was the absence of my period and my next scheduled weekend away. For every social invite, I’d consult the proximity of the next dismissively scrawled ‘P’ in my diary before confirming my attendance. But when my husband and I were soon to consider conceiving, that monthly marker became less a warning signal and more a beacon of possibility and opportunity.

For nearly three decades, I’d believed my period was just like its grammatical namesake: a full stop. A time to retreat and wait for normal life, exercise and productivity to resume. But that’s where I was wrong. A woman’s period is – physiologically, reproductively, and socioculturally – only ever the beginning. It is the literal cleansing of the uterus. A foundational step to pre-empt the release of a new egg. The green light for a new wave of oestrogen to sweep in and sweep us up in a burst of physical and social activity for which we’re physiologically primed. It’s the only common variable by which every woman can identify the beginning of her cycle. It’s the blank space beneath a new chapter heading. 

So much more the capital first letter than the dot at the end of a sentence, why was the period dismissed as a measly punctuation mark? This misconception was certainly reinforced by common practice in the 90s, 00s and 10s to prescribe hormonal contraception for every young woman with acne, headaches, heavy or painful periods, mood swings and, even, elite athletic aspirations. A blister pack of 21 or 28 magic pills of predictability, endorsed by medical practitioners and even sports coaches trained to edit out and overlook the singlemost important indicator of a woman’s health. 

The cock-up of contraception

Whatever you think of hormonal contraceptive, and however you interpret the limited and conflicting research on its long-term use, the vilification of female sex hormones is a unifying experience for women who came of age in the last 30 years. The favoured solution to their fluctuating nature was to control their fluctuations by adding more hormones. To manipulate its variability into consistency and stability. For the better part of three decades (maybe more?), we’ve been trying to stomp the natural undulations of our cycles into a flat line. Well, that logic is flatlining. 

Like the axis-shifting revelation that the Earth is round and not flat, the 2020s will be the decade we unpick the misperception that cyclical is unpredictable, and finally begin to understand and harness the power of the menstrual cycle as nature intended. When assessing the quality of a lab study, we look at its results and how reproducible they are. If we analyse the menstrual cycle as a study in female physiology, there is no outcome more reproducible. Sure, hormones rise and fall, but they do it again, and again, and again. While deviation from these patterns for a single individual may be a useful cry for help from her body, deviations from person to person usually fall within a familiar, reassuring pattern to self-monitor and use to our advantage. Read that again. To. Our. Advantage.

Already studies are highlighting the natural phenomenon of female sex hormones and their practical benefits. It’s telling that female anatomy, sexual desire and periods are all fair game for comic relief – as evidenced by the popularity (and hilarity!) of Hayley Morris’ Me vs Brain reels on Instagram. It’s when we’re comfortable enough to laugh about something, that we get closer to understanding it. 

I should add that oral contraception for its intended purpose – contraception – was and is an invaluable resource for women’s rights. This I cannot be too quick to clarify, when questionably regressive decisions are being made for women in a country with the power and responsibility to set positive and progressive standards. Yet, for many, birth control is secondary in their decision to take oral contraceptives, and for those women we need to reevaluate the menstrual cycle as a tool for better understanding and improving our wellbeing. 

The simplest way to understand the menstrual cycle is in two phases – although there are also four-phase models likened to the seasons, for those who want to find more parallels in the cycles around us. The first phase is the Follicular Phase: it starts with the period, ends with ovulation, sees the highest rise of oestrogen, thrives on carbohydrates for energy, has the greatest potential for both strength and aerobic gains and the lowest risk of injury. The second phase is the Luteal Phase: it starts with ovulation, ends with the period, sees the highest rise of progesterone, prefers fat for energy and is typically a good time to consolidate training gains or include a down-training week.

When the menstrual cycle deviates from this, it’s called menstrual dysfunction. Unfortunately, menstrual dysfunction rarely exists in isolation. The Female Health Triad, first recognised in the 90s, identified menstrual dysfunction as sharing commonly interrelated conditions of low bone mineral density and nutritional deficiency. The menstrual cycle went from a cringey inconvenience to a highly advantageous litmus test for female wellbeing. It wasn’t until 2014, when the International Olympic Committee renamed it RED-S (Relative Energy Deficiency in Sport), that it became more common (but still not that common) to talk about the menstrual cycle when treating and training women. Eight years later, we still have so much to learn.

Less maverick, more mentor; What the menstrual cycle teaches us 

I’m including a graph published by zrtlab.com, which is one of the best depictions of the two-phase menstrual cycle I’ve seen. The corresponding article is also a brilliant synopsis of some of the most important and current research and the impact it may have on female performance, for those inclined to dive deeper into the science. It draws on much of the same data that inspired the scientists behind cycle tracking app FitrWoman to automatically match the tangible events within your body to the corresponding physiology you cannot see. It helps to flag experiences which repeat at similar times of your cycle, become better at anticipating changes in your body and even appreciate how you can better support your body throughout your cycle. 

There are many things we can learn from our menstrual cycle. Already I’m drafting a listicle to highlight the headline lessons without drowning out the intended social observation of today’s piece. One thing that does stand out to me is how divisive the observational studies are, particularly those which ask their subjects about the perceived effect of either A) having a natural period or B) taking oral contraceptives to manipulate their periods. In both cases, around half of women report training and/or feeling better on oral contraceptives, while half report training and/or feeling better when they come off oral contraceptives. We know that our perception dramatically affects our experience (hello again, neuroplasticity!), so I wonder how much better we can make our experience when we commit to learning about and even celebrating our menstrual cycles. 

It could well mean changing the way we assess success – particularly in the way we train, looking for different outcomes at optimal times of our cycles and therefore giving ourselves more reasons to call each workout a win. It may even mean looking at our monthly schedules differently, so we are more productive and get more enjoyment out of the things with which we fill our diaries. Maisie Hill’s book Period Power explores this idea in depth. I’d even hazard to say it will improve our understanding of perimenopause, as learning to intuit a regular cycle can only make us more conscious of deviations to those cycles. More awareness brings more curiosity, so perhaps it’s also the foundation that ushers in more research dedicated to understanding and enhancing the female experience. Hazel Wallace’s new book The Female Factor considers the male bias in medical research and attempts to fill some of the practical gaps left by that bias. It’s an important step in educating the women who are asking the questions, so that our experts have to start finding better answers. 

Shifting the female contraceptive burden 

I do hope that some of the answers come in the form of male-led contraceptives. A huge part of the menstrual cycle’s misconception as an inconvenience does of course come down to the female burden to prevent pregnancy. I’m someone who’s body has steadfastly denied every form of female contraception. Most recently, my uterus left-hooked the copper coil to the curb with debilitating 14-day periods, rendering my own ultra-regular 28-day cycle nearly unrecognisable. Non-hormonal contraception seemed like an obvious winner, but restoring my body’s status quo feels less like losing and more like a return to self. My period played a similar role when it emerged after my 14 months of breastfeeding twins. I saw it as my body’s signal to let my own identity re-surface alongside the maternal role that had blurred my individuality. Mind, I will be handing the pregnancy prevention baton back to my husband until something better comes along (the rhythm method, Natural Cycles, etc, I’ll be watching you). As much as I do adore our three small children, the procreative cycle is one I’ve pedalled enough in this season of life.

I started this piece talking about one type of cycle. As time has passed, I’ve noticed so many more around me. Seasons. Generations. Relationships. Creative processes. Societal shifts. The years that start in January and the years that start in September. When we begin to appreciate our own internal cycles, it opens our world to how natural – even predictable – it is to find cycles everywhere we look. There’s something beautiful in the crest and shallow of a wave; in the way neither lasts for long. In a fast-paced age when there is so much drive for progress and growth, cycles offer both a grounding constant and the recurring opportunity to catch the next wave of change. Understanding the world as a series of cycles – including our lives and the bodies in which we live them – creates more space to grow, and simultaneously less pressure to do so.

At nearly 34, I likely have fewer years with a regular menstrual cycle ahead of me than I have behind me, so I’m happy I can live and train in harmony with my cycle while it’s here.

There’s a sliding scale of life on which a certain tipping point resets our years to start again in September, not January. Parenthood is a failsafe trigger. 

‘Hot girl summer’ was another missed headline on social media, exchanged for ‘hot mess summer’ in which I met Instagram’s idealised workouts in the sun with actual suitcase carries – five of them between two able adults, to be precise. 

For six solid weeks, the closest I came to a deadlift was peeling mid-tantrum children off the floors they decidedly glued themselves too – super-suction is an underestimated super power. Is it just me, or does its agreeable inanimateness make a barbell more appealing than ever? 

Then September lands like an A380 with its brakes on the brink. There’s the whiplash of a new term, overlapping extracurriculars and back-to-school bugs disrupting it all, but there’s also the hope of shoehorning your own goals in amongst it all. You approach the start, again, tinged with a touch of resentment that you took two steps back from your pre-summer progress. But what you may not realise is this is the progress that matters most. 

So common is the refrain ‘consistency is king’ that it either rolls off the ear dismissively, or bounces irritatingly off the ear drum when it does penetrate. We hear a command we think we cannot deliver without constraint. We see ‘3-5 days per week’ workouts and progressive overload that never relapses. We pick up the drum stick and beat ourselves with it yet again, when there is a real opportunity to instead beat our own fucking drum, because there is no one more consistent than a parent. 

No one shows up, sacrifices, reinvents and adapts more, under more fatigue and with less support, than a mum or dad does for their kids. So brushing the dust off your shoulders and shaking the creak out of your joints to start again with your training? To you, that’s child’s play.

What’s more? You’re not starting where you started last time. Consider this. Divide the year into, say, six mini-seasons of training. Each season you take three steps forward – learning new movements, up-skilling, improving your technique, healing an injury, etc. Say, on average, you take one step back with each of the mini off-seasons life mandates. One year later, you’ll still be 12 steps forward. 

That’s a lot further forward than you’d be if your threw in the towel. So imagine yourself, a year from now, advanced another 12 steps in pursuing the kind of health that helps you to realise all that you are and all that you can be. About to start another season, building on all that you’ve built before. 

So start. Start again. This September, and a hundred times thereafter. Super-suction is cool (not), but starting again is the real superpower. 

If you want to make the next mini-season of training matter more, and learn movements and skills that will stay with you for every season thereafter, get in touch to enquire about my private personal training in Dubai. I specialise in coaching women through their own seasons of life – perinatal, menstrual and perimenopausal especially. 

Astrid was facing me when I delivered her, lying on my side. I was only vaguely aware of my husband cutting her cord while we spent a few minutes alone, her against my chest, us against the world. Her first cry, like a geyser breaking surface, softened the tension of worry in my chest. There was space now for something else. And someone else, too. 

Dylan was ready in waiting, rapid through an open birth canal, as I pulled her to daylight and met her there, face to face. Two ‘back to back’ deliveries carried on a flood of oxytocin. A second tidal wave of love. A river of tears shed in relief. Two warm, healthy babies migrated from my belly to my chest. 35 weeks and 4 days of positive affirmation, sweetly affirmed. They were here. (Full birth story here) 

Here we were, beginning a period of tremendous adjustment. Undertaking the fourth trimester with two babies is an altogether remarkable experience, and I hope some of my shared experience will guide and support you in yours. 

MIND 

Like many new mums of multiples, I had to say goodbye to my new babies nearly as promptly as I’d welcomed them. They spent three nights in NICU to support their low birth weight. Their suck reflux still underdeveloped, I hand-expressed milk (with the support and skill of my wonderful doula Lala Langtry-White!) for the nurses to feed them through syringes. 

I took up a quiet, surreal residence in the post-natal ward, a hospital-grade pump whirring like white noise while the cries of new babies and the coos of their mothers punctuated the silence. I listened to my neighbours learning a new language, and it brought me both comfort and pain. This was every bit as contradicting as the sorrow and reassurance I felt by the softly shuffling shoes, beeps and alarms of the NICU. My babies were healthy, they were going to be OK – teeny, tiny as they were, but free of breathing tubes and IVs. I saw them every three hours, and they would come home with me after three nights. We were lucky. But this cycle of feed, pump and clock-watch was only just beginning… 

RISING RESILIENCE

Nurses periodically checked on me, too. I recall the shock of uterine contractions far more intense than they’d been with my first – common after twin deliveries, but something for which I wasn’t prepared. I’d wince as my tummy was squished and adjusted to accelerate the eviction. The emptier my uterus, the greater the disconnect I began to feel between me and my babies. Our team of three was divided, them alone in their NICU pods, me a floor above in the post-natal ward. 

The shock of separation was overshadowed only by the shock of our reunion, a mere hour before our discharge. Three days had stretched on and on, then like a rubber band it snapped and the reality of handling two premature babies with no medical supervision – and a surreal new March 2020 pandemic world crumbling around us – would become the single most resilience-affirming event of my life. 

At home with the twins, everything was new. And everything was challenging. Dylan was an extremely sleepy feeder. So we learned about finger-feeding and my husband helped with top-ups after feeds. Lockdowns kept getting stricter, so we embraced frequent 10-minute walks around the block. The twins increasingly tag-teamed when they slept, so we tried every variation of tandem sling to synchronise their naps. My eldest began to rebel, so we designed 10-minute activities to give her the one-on-one time she desperately needed. Day by day, it got easier. Except that it didn’t. We were just getting more resilient. 

VICTORY IN VULNERABILITY 

This is a picture of my 30-week twins (inutero) and I catching up on some Brene Brown a few weeks before their delivery. Brene’s insights on vulnerability would prove more relevant than I anticipated. Recognising vulnerability as my ultimate strength was the life-preserver that kept me afloat through my fourth trimester with twins. This wasn’t something that came easily to me, but the exceptional challenges of having two very small twin babies to care for (and a stay-at-home toddler used to running off steam at nursery) made real, honest, ego-abating vulnerability the best healing resource for all of us. 

It was my vulnerability that made me hold my hands up and admit I needed help at night. I needed, for at least a few nights a week, the certainty of sleep. We employed a part-time night nurse “for the first month” (which turned into nearly nine!). The nurse would bring the babies in sequence to me for their feeds, and take care of the burping, changes and resettling in between. I’d pump for one night feed, allowing me to sleep for a 3-4 hour stretch. 

When the familiar tug-and-pull of mum-guilt kicked in – or that type-A calling to do-it-all – I’d run a mental list of everything I had achieved in a single day managing my tribe of minis. I could either be willingly vulnerable and ask for help when I needed it, or I could drive myself into the ground and become unwillingly vulnerable in the process. In a pandemic era, that picture became even clearer. To accept help was to prioritise health. 

BODY

I was always prepared for the likely outcome of a C-section and a slower return to exercise – nearly 60% of twins are born this way in the UK (NHS), and far more in the UAE. The stars aligned beautifully for the vaginal birth I wanted, and I was lucky to begin a return to movement quite soon after delivery. 

The physicality of looking after twins – particularly when there are older children involved – is nothing short of a daily workout itself, so a proactive (and gentle) return to exercise is hugely beneficial to facilitating your strength and resilience to everyday movement. This is true independent of how you birthed your twins, so I’ll include some variations of the rehab and strengthening journey I followed so you can tailor it to your own needs and experience. 

FIRST STEPS 

To counter the sedentary nature of a very strict lockdown, I dusted off an old aerobic step and simply did very basic, low-impact steps up and down. I’d prioritise knee-over-ankle alignment and kept my pinky toe heavy, which helps to maintain or restore the arch in your foot, commonly flattened during pregnancy. This was a great time to work on my breathing and initiate the connection between diaphragm and pelvic floor; exhaling with each step up as I drew up and in with my pelvic floor, inhaling with each step down as I allowed those support muscles to soften. Relax and enjoy your movement (it was my personal sanity check in the early days!) but occasionally bring your mind to your posture and align your ribs with your hips – this is the neutral posture that best recruits your core and supports your spine. 

I was ready to start a bit of movement on the mat around 2 weeks postpartum. I’d combine the diaphragm breath with a deeper low-belly connection and practice this in seated, kneeling and all-fours positions. I did do some supine exercises, but was wary of doing all my core work while lying on my back, because it limits how much circumferential tensioning (the corset-like movement of transverse abs drawing in) is possible. 

As well as bodyweight connections, I was quick to add a resistance band to classic post-natal exercises like heel slides and leg marches. Holding the theraband with straight arms, I’d gently pull on it during the ‘working’ part of the movement. This would add a bit more load to my core – both a way of progressing the exercise, and a way of helping to isolate the work in the abs. 

By six weeks post-natal, I was ready to introduce a light weight to familiar movement patterns I’d been practising with no weight or with only a resistance band. This post from Instagram shares 7 movements that felt beneficial for me during my early postpartum recovery.

My personal post-natal guidelines proved very accurate to my experience this time around: allow 3 months to rehabilitate (establishing excellent whole-body connectivity via the core), 3 months to pre-habilitate (build strength with the intention of preventing injury), and 3 months to rebuild (bringing your strength back on par with your pre-pregnancy or early pre-natal levels). 

SENSE CHECKS 

Due to the pandemic, and the craziness of our schedule at home with 3 children under 3, I didn’t get around to my post-natal physio check-up until nearly 9 months post-natal. On many levels, I was as strong as I had been pre-pregnancy, but I was lacking the intimate knowledge of my internal support muscles that only a pelvic health physio can ascertain. So away I went to the much-recommended Optimal Fitness physio team, where I learned that my pelvic floor was in good shape bar a potential expulsion of one of the muscles (which hadn’t affected my capabilities whatsoever), and that my core was functioning well. 

However, what drove me to finally book in was an acute and sudden flare up of lower back pain. My take-away learnings were important, so listen up. I was given full permission to load my core and to FLEX my spine in order to progress my fitness and optimise the mobility of my spine – which was currently ‘stuck’ along the length of my lumbar. I was about to embark on Munira Hudani’s Diastasis Recti course, which would address some of my pre-held beliefs about minimising flexion when working with a diastasis and redirect the emphasis to effective tensioning around the lines alba. The timing couldn’t have been better, because the absence of flexion in my spine was the very thing causing the lower back pain I’d been trying to avoid. My remaining diastasis was minimal, but even if it was bigger, I could produce strong and consistent tension in my midline to support abdominal flexion. And it was this very abdominal flexion – starting with very gentle spinal rolls to ease up my stiff lumbar spine, progressing to crunches, rotational crunches and loaded C-curve exercises, which helped restore my mobility. 

BUMP

I denied painkillers for the uterine contractions that lasted around 48 hours after delivery. The nurses thought me a strange anomaly, denying easy access to increased comfort. But I needed my discomfort because, in the absence of my babies, pain was my one reminder that they had only just been with me, and that they would soon be with me again. And so began an odd (although I don’t think entirely unique) appreciation for the physical inconveniences of the early postpartum experience. 

Recently a boulder of a belly, my bump shrivelled quickly into a soft, squishy mound. My once over-stretched, itchy skin suddenly too ample for the reduced contents of my abdomen. But my perineum was intact (a remarkable change from my first birth, after which sitting and walking became activities to learn anew). My core was working as you’d expect a recently reconfigured core to work, with a reassuring whisper of promised rehabilitation. And, aside from the relentless pumping and trips to the NICU floor below, I could actually catch an hour or two of sleep in frequent intervals. 

BREASTFEEDING TWINS 

Just as day 3 was coming to a close, and we were taking tentative steps towards the hospital’s exit, my 3-hourly double feeding and double pumping regime rewarded me with two brand new boulders. These particular rocks would not be terribly amenable to very small, new babies whose suckling response was coming along slowly. Once again on hand in each moment of mini-crisis, my wonderful doula encouraged me to keep the faith and feed and pump as much as possible. With premature babies, establishing an over-supply is your best possible shot at sustaining breastfeeding when their little bodies (and appetites) catch up. It was brilliant advice (another shoutout to doula/angel Lala Langtry-White!), but advice I felt resentful of as I continued to plug my sore breasts into my Medela Freestyle Double Pump. Brilliant pump, by the way, but still I scoffed at how much a prisoner I felt to something with a name implying any level of freedom. 

POSTPARTUM REFLECTIONS 

Fast forward a few weeks and my resentment was growing into something like gratitude. I had three full freezers (we’d bought an extra one especially) stuffed full of breast milk. My babies were feeding much better and accepting top-ups from my husband and a night nurse. My breasts would occasionally deflate enough to resemble, well, breasts. The skin on my belly became tauter; my gentle core activations resulting in a much stronger connection to my core. I was chalking up more new skills than I could count.

I had thought I would take more photos of my changing body, but even as it was changing I was aware that the physical changes were woefully unrepresentative of my personal growth. Yes, the body in the mirror was beginning to look more familiar to me, but the person looking back at me was evolving in ways my reflection could never capture. How could I celebrate a shrinking belly when I could celebrate all that growth instead? 

TWIN TALK 

They’re here! If you’ve stayed with me through the last four blog posts, I hope they’ve proved useful for processing your own experience with a twin pregnancy. If I can leave any bite-size tips for expectant multiples mums or new twin mums, it would be these: 

• Respect your rehab. Your body changed more dramatically than your average pregnancy. It probably didn’t feel like a particularly linear experience, so don’t put undue expectation on yourself to experience a linear physical recovery.

• Invest in support. I highlighted this as a 3rd trimester bullet and I’ll do so again now, because it is never too late to get support. A doula or midwife who can support you either side of your delivery will ensure you feel seen when the world as you knows it gets a little blurry. Know that the picture will clear up soon, but surrounding yourself with less fuzzy eyes certainly helps to keep you sane in the meantime. Most twin parents I’ve met have also enlisted the support of a night nurse, at least on a part-time or short-term basis. The costs of having multiple babies at once are certainly more concentrated, but your spending soon levels out. I’ve not regretted a single penny spent that helped me survive the fourth trimester with twins. 

• One of everything (except car seats) will likely do for a while. Twin babies tend to arrive on the small side, so they can share a moses basket, pram and play mat for some time. You can also sleep your babies in a single cot until you’re ready to buy a second one. We used a Halo double bassinet at nighttime (pictured above), which was lovely but not strictly necessary. If you only invest in the following, you’ll have all the ‘twin stuff’ you need: 
  • A good twin breastfeeding pillow. The Brest Friend twin pillow was my go-to. 
  • A double pump. The Medela Freestyle Flex worked brilliantly for me. I’d also consider the Baby Buddha as a lighter, more portable pump, compatible with most flanges, as a newer option much-loved by many of my twin mum peers.
  • A double baby carrier. I used the MiniMonkey in the early weeks, and a standard fabric sling for single baby snuggles, too. 

• Your oversupply will be one of your biggest and most welcome challenges. Embrace it early, because it’s much harder to increase your supply once the weeks pass by and your twins begin demanding more milk. I know it’s frustrating and you feel tied to either your pump or your babies, but if you can fill a freezer or two in the early weeks you’ll soon regain the independence you crave. Save the yellow colostrum-rich milk, too. We defrosted it whenever one or both of the twins were poorly to give them extra vitamins in their top-ups. 

• Know all your feeding options. Yes, this includes formula, which is an entirely valid option for you and your babies. Note though that it’s often adopted much earlier for premature babies because it is easier to facilitate in NICU. However, there are many other options including, but not excluding: syringe feeding, cup feeding and finger feeding. I didn’t personally exhaust all of these, but I dabbled in many and knowing they existed helped me to feel more hopeful and resilient in the face of early breastfeeding challenges. 

• Be patient, with yourself and your babies. If your babies arrive premature, it takes them a little longer to smile back at you, and it’s OK to crave more from your time with them in the early days and weeks. They will overdeliver in so many ways down the line. Ours started to recognise each other and play together at five months, and that was a real turning point for me in truly loving being a parent to twins. 18 months in, I wouldn’t have it any other way. 

• When you take photos, know that it will probably be two years before you get around to filing them or doing much with them. If you have identical twins, create an album in your phone for each of them so you can save them in their personal albums on a daily or weekly basis. As someone attempting to play ‘Guess Who?’ more than 18 months later, I can tell you it would have been a much more efficient (and accurate!) use of time!

For more pre-natal wellness support, pick up your copy of Mind, Body, Bump today. If you missed my earlier blogs, you can read here about the first trimester, second trimester and third trimester of my twin pregnancy.

Four days after my last post (circa 18 months, one eventful twin birth and a global pandemic ago), my third trimester ended abruptly with the arrival of my twin girls. In many ways, I feel like my Never-Neverland of a fourth trimester is only now coming to close, so forgive me for only now reflecting on the final weeks of my twin pregnancy and the early days of mothering multiples. 

I was lucky to make it to 35 weeks and 4 days with my littles. Like many multiples’ mums-to-be, I was prepared by obstetricians and midwives to expect a short third trimester. Meeting and surpassing the 32-week mark became the holy grail: the line-in-the-sand after which most professionals agreed premature babies are strong enough to survive without too arduous a stay in NICU. While this was a positive focal point for me at the time, on typing it now I realise how traumatic an experience it is to set survival milestones on the outcome of your pregnancy. I realise how little I thought about holding two bundles of brand new baby against my body, and how preoccupied I became instead with advocating for my unpopular wishes (more on that later) at antenatal appointments and sorting worst-case-scenario logistics for managing new babies in the hospital and a toddler at home.

Like all pregnancies, the third trimester is when things get real. It’s simple maths, really. If you slash weeks off that trimester, things get very real, very fast. So consider the following a short, positive (but also real) account of 28 weeks plus with more than one baby in your belly. 

MIND 

As I mentioned in the second trimester instalment of this series, positive visualisation was an important part of my twin pregnancy throughout. As the reality of bringing two babies into the world took grip, my visualisations became more real, too. Where previously I would imagine the happy faces of my midwives telling me that all was going well, now I would imagine getting up comfortably (from the birthing bed), walking confidently to my babies, feeling strong enough to care for them, and trusting in their little bodies being healthy and safe in my arms. 

This became a grounding practice for me whenever I felt overwhelmed by an antenatal vocabulary full of words like ‘risk’, ‘emergency’, ‘premature’, etc. While I moved my antenatal care to a new country at exactly the transition from second to third trimester, I believe I would have navigated cautious advice for twin mothers whether I was with the NHS in the UK or with my private OB in the UAE.

My ability to remain optimistic and challenge this twin pregnancy advice (with appropriate understanding of the evidence), was in big part enabled by hiring a doula highly experienced in supporting multiples and/or high-risk births. Educated in the very latest science, and with a little black book full of leading experts in antenatal and neonatal medicine, she could signpost me to objective information and soundboard my (complicated) feelings to help me reach my own conclusions. Importantly, doulas do not direct you towards their personal preferences, but instead help you to feel comfortable with the decisions you make, and advocate for you to ensure your wishes and choices are heard and respected within your antenatal support team. 

(It’s impossible to reference the benefit of doulas without praising and naming my own: Lala Langtry-White. She is a force of proactivity, positivity and progression for mothers in the UAE and globally – she’s even remotely supported births abroad, and become a friend and confidante to many in the face of the exceptional demands presented by the pandemic in recent months. I would strongly encourage any woman with a pregnancy classified as high-risk to reach out to her or a fellow doula who specialises accordingly.) 

For me, it was hugely important to my mental health that I could ask questions and receive scientifically-supported, unbiased answers. It was crucial to me that my doctors remained open to supporting a vaginal birth if it was safe for my babies and me. Feeling heard, respected and supported are the pillars of maintaining a healthy mind during pregnancy, so equipping yourself with the support you need to speak freely is the best advice I can offer.

The third trimester overview below is a one-page extract from my book Mind, Body, Bump, so you can quickly get to grips with what’s going on in your body. From here, it’s time to make confident steps to achieve the antenatal care, the birth and the postnatal help you need to feel empowered and supported as a new mother (particularly if your circumstances are more challenging than you might wish). 

BODY

Exercise in the third trimester of a twin pregnancy is, well, not really optional. If you’re moving, you’re exercising. In 2019, scientists found that pregnancy exceeds the energy expenditure of every athletic pursuit, maintaining the maximum possible metabolic output of 2.5X BMR – equivalent to running a marathon – for months on end. Now add another baby to the mix. The human body is stretched to its limits internally and externally during a twin pregnancy. For me, the rate of bump’s growth between 28 and 32 weeks was especially astonishing. 

Moving my body at this stage became more of antidote to my regular daily movement, rather than additional activity. With a tot in tow and a new house to convert into a home, it was difficult to find time to put my feet up. The pull of my bump and extra gravitational weight invariably accumulated, so offloading my back and pelvis was key. Exercises supported by the Swiss ball – like this sequence from my Instagram grid – would gently fire up my glutes and allow me to re-connect with my core, while taking much of the work out of my lower back. 

Positions that opened my pelvis and softened my pelvic floor – child’s pose and supported butterfly, for examples – felt particularly nice, as these muscles were overworking big time to keep me upright (and dry). I’m pleased to report it (mostly) they held its ground, but a belly belt was also a welcome addition to the support squad when I knew I’d spend much of the day on my feet. It adds gentle support under and around your bump, which I found also reminded me to activate the underlying deep core muscles – twin pregnancies take team work! 

Speaking of time on your feet, I want to take a moment to talk about commonly-prescribed bed rest during twin pregnancies. Nearly every third trimester twin-mum-to-be I’ve known has been recommended bed rest. Due to the extra weight of the uterus, the cervix can weaken and dilate much earlier when you’re carrying more than one baby. OBs have a number of solutions up their sleeves, including cervical stitches, pessaries, and of course bed rest. Reducing pressure on the cervix does make good sense if you find yourself in the position (as I did) of having a condom-wrapped camera shoved up your vagina every week to determine how much shorter your cervix is from one appointment to the next. BUT – and it’s a big but – strict and prolonged bed rest also results in deconditioning of the very muscles you’re going to need onside when you do bring those babies into the world. 

Instead of accepting a ban of all exercise, ask your OB what kind of exercise alternatives may be appropriate for your circumstances. I pushed back and agreed a number of movements that allowed me to keep active without adding to the downward pressure on my cervix. Seated, supported recline, forward leaning and all-fours exercises can in fact help you recruit your pelvic and core support muscles to better resist those downward forces!

Researchers at the University of Alberta also pushed back on this popular anti-exercise prognosis. In a 2020 report for the British Journal of Sports Medicine, they presented evidence to challenge the classification of twin pregnancy beyond 28 weeks as an ‘absolute contraindication to exercise’ for this very reason. Instead, researchers advise its demotion to a ‘relative contraindication’, encouraging more case-specific considerations so that more expectant twin mums can continue to enjoy the many benefits of appropriate pre-natal exercise. 

BUMP

I’ve already mentioned weeks 28 to 32 – blimey, those four weeks feel like an entire pregnancy in themselves. I went through half a bottle of Mama Mio oil to calm my itchy skin, discarded any tightly fitting fabric to the back of my wardrobe and sometimes had to physically lift my bump just to marvel at how remarkably robust my middle had become. Any semblance of squishiness disappeared – I had a boulder for a belly, and no desire to long for ‘rock hard abs’ ever again. However, those sandbag carries I used to practise (with reluctance) in Crossfit-like classes became a laughing matter; I was stronger than I’d ever imagined I could be! 

Then the growth slowed a bit. I went from waking every morning (straddling a Bbhugme pillow like a life raft) with the confidence that my girls were growing and thriving, to hesitating on the bedside and waiting anxiously for kicks to reassure me that everything was OK. My visits to the OB confirmed that the girls were pumping the brakes as we approached a somewhat terrifying intersection – the girls were running out of space and would soon be looking for a green light for birth. Still on the small side, we’d need to prepare them accordingly. At 34 weeks, I had steroid injections to advance their lung development. My induction was booked for 36 weeks, with near-daily monitoring in the interim.

As I sat in a hospital bed the day before they were born, watching their two heart beats flicker in and out of sync with one another, I found the quiet time so eery. Too much space to ruminate, speculate… and wait. Less than 24 hours later, their noisy post-birth cries would prove the relief for which I’d been waiting. (Note: 18 months later, I’ve never longed for the quiet like I do now, ha!) 

We didn’t make my planned induction. The babies’, taking after me for sure, had ideas of their own. But that’s another story I’ve previously shared on Instagram. I know the choice to read birth stories is hugely personal while you’re pregnant, so if you would like a (positive!) account of a twin birth, please read my story here. Or, skip ahead to my next post, which will summarise a fourth trimester wilder and sweeter than I could have ever anticipated. 

TWIN TALK 

I’ve now written in some depth about a lot of the unique learnings from a twin pregnancy in the third trimester, but here are the bullet points I think you need to know when your twins’ arrival is fast approaching: 

• For dichorionic, diamniotic (DiDi) and monochorionic, diamniotic (MoDi) pregnancies, NICE guidelines do recommend that a safe vaginal delivery is possible if the first twin is head down. Depending where your antenatal care is based (and whether you are in a private or public healthcare system), you may receive different advice. Make sure that any advice which deviates from this is for good reason, and specific to your circumstances; not due to a non-evidence-based bias by your provider.
  • Also know that, if you are concerned about your delivery and feel safer with a Caesarean section (or circumstances dictate that a Caesarean section is medically safest), your wishes should be heard and respected. There are many ways to make an abdominal birth intimate and powerful. Doulas are fantastic at enabling this, but many OBs will also allow and encourage options to personalise the operating room and help you feel calm and supported during your section. 

• When it feels like a lot can go wrong with a twin pregnancy or delivery, remember that a lot can go right, too. It’s useful to consider what you would do in the face of certain challenges like extended NICU time, where you may have to move between home and hospital or divide your household to care for other children. Put the necessary contingency plans in place, then put a pin in them and move on to focusing on all the things that can and will go wonderfully right. Knowing that you can cope with anything will free up valuable headspace to hold positive affirmations of those first cuddles (there will be lots of them!) and precious moments of early bonding (between them, too – it really is special).

• Offload your lower back and pelvic floor as much as possible. Consider using a belly band around the house, factor in more active exercises like bridges and seated leg marches to maintain your strength, do deep belly breaths daily to practise using your core to hug your bump, then spend time passively resting with your pelvis open in positions like child’s pose and supported butterfly. 

• Enlist the support you need now and think you may want after your twins are born. This really is a once-in-a-lifetime experience. Really, how likely is it you’ll ever give birth to twins (or more) again? I can’t recommend enough having a doula onside, who supports you both pre-natally and post-natally, and who helps to signpost to other support you may need, such as lactation consultants, sleep consultants, night nannies and more. Alternatively, research and reach out to your preferred providers for logistical support you may need down the line, so that you can easily put solutions in place for challenges as and when you face them. Is there a good community of multiples mums you can join offline or online? Join it now, and make friends who are or will be in the same boat as you! When things get shaky, they’ll help you hold the oars steady. I’ll share more about some of the postnatal support I found invaluable in my fourth trimester blog to follow.
  • Twins Trust in the UK provides a one-day course for expectant parents of twins, and TwinsPlus Arabia in the UAE hosts many events and support groups for multiples parents, parents of premature babies and more. Multiples of America also helps you find families nearby who share similar circumstances.

For more pre-natal wellness support, pick up your copy of Mind, Body, Bump today. If you missed my earlier blogs, you can read here about the first trimester and second trimester of my twin pregnancy. Or jump to the fourth trimester now.

Coming at you from Dubai (6 weeks into relocating), and with a 35-week twin bump so big I have to assume a pretty compromising position just to write this post at my desk! My babies are very nearly fully cooked – my OB here will allow them to stay put until 37 weeks if they are so minded, then it’s time to hurry things along with an induction. I want to take this time to reflect on and offer some second trimester tips before those 16 weeks become too distant a memory. If you missed it, you can read my first trimester reflections here. Note, there have been several twists and turns since I posted that blog. I can confirm that no one pregnancy is alike… and sometimes even one pregnancy can look and feel very different within the same gestation! As before, I’ll follow the pillars of my pre-natal wellness book Mind, Body, Bump to summarise essential second trimester considerations, plus tips especially relevant for mums of multiples.

MIND 

I spent most of my second trimester throwing myself into my work and into the logistics of relocating a family, business and antenatal support system to Dubai in late January of this year. While a convenient distraction, I think I would have found similar projects to busy my mind, even if circumstances had been different. 

Although the first trimester can feel like a slog while you wait for things to look ship-shape enough to share your good news with friends and family, the second trimester is the longest in your pregnancy and it is marked by the first substantial physical evidence that you really are growing a baby (or two)! Mentally keeping up with those physical changes is a challenge; it’s natural to have mixed feelings or anxieties about becoming a mother – whether it’s for the first time or you’re adding to your existing nest. 

I stopped reading as many books in my second trimester – partly because I was short on time, but also because I wanted to tune into my own experience of this pregnancy and not colour it with too much outside influence. Unlike my first pregnancy, I chose to be completely oblivious about how big my babies were or what fruit they were most like during any given week. Instead, I looked down at my tummy and watched them grow organically. I couldn’t control all the outward distractions by way of deadlines or moving arrangements, but I could silence some of the extra noise about my pregnancy and choose to feel it rather than read about it. 

Sound ironic coming from a pre-natal author? That’s precisely why I designed Mind, Body, Bump so you can quickly scan it for essential context without getting drawn into pages full of overwhelming text or opinion. I believe that understanding context is important for manifesting self-compassion during pregnancy, but cramming in facts and stats can draw you too far away from your own unique experience. Only you can create and grow your baby(ies), and only you can truly understand what it means to do so. 

The second trimester overview below is an extracted one-page summary of all the changes in your mind and body during the second trimester. It will help you to self-educate as efficiently as possible, then move onto experiencing all the weird and wonderful maternal adjustments for yourself. 

It’s worth noting that one of the big second trimester decisions is of course whether to gender reveal at the 20-week anatomy scan. Again, some people crave more context than others. During my first pregnancy, the idea of becoming a mum felt so abstract to me that learning I had a daughter on the way was actually helpful to connecting with her while she grew inside me. 

Had this pregnancy been a single pregnancy, we were open to a blind birth-date. However, with the news of twins proving such a surprise in the first trimester, we went for a full reveal once again. Lucky we did, as it turns out the twins we thought were rocking a placenta each were in fact sharing one between them (Monochorionic and Diamniotic, for any twin mamas reading, or those otherwise interested in twin pregnancy classifications). Essentially, that put us on course for more monitoring and potentially fewer birth choices.

To manage anxiety overload, I set mini-milestones every couple weeks so I could focus on the things I could control day to day. This is essentially a goal-management strategy not unlike training for an athletic event, and it provided a framework for staying optimistic about the outcome of my pregnancy. If you come up against pregnancy challenges that require extra caution or management, try imagining how you’ll feel when you receive the best possible news at the next scan or appointment. Positive visualisation has a powerful effect on reducing stress hormones, which can only serve to mentally and physically improve the way you experience your pregnancy.  

BODY

In the second trimester I was able to say goodbye to the hormonal headaches I experienced in my first trimester. While my energy levels never fluctuated much, many women report feeling far more motivated and active as pregnancy hormones begin to level off and provide a more stable foundation for mums-to-be. Like many second-or-more-time-mums, compounded with the additional growth of baby number two, the physical changes of pregnancy came much thicker and faster than they did with my first-born. 

I continued to weight train throughout my second trimester, but cut high-impact exercise like jogging or jumping completely at this time. Subsequent pregnancies can prompt your center of gravity to shift faster, while muscle memory sees the joints and abdominal muscles give way more readily to the ‘relaxing’ effects of the pregnancy hormone relaxin. Plus, the physicality of keeping up with older children often requires moderating the intensity of exercise you do sooner than you felt necessary in earlier pregnancies. 

I simplified my exercise selection, only practising compound exercises (think squats, deadlifts, cleans, etc that use many muscle groups at once) with which I was very familiar. Sometimes that meant doing them in isolation rather than as part of a larger circuit, or simply reducing the weight I was lifting. While I continued lifting about 80% of my pre-pregnancy weight throughout my second trimester during my first pregnancy, 70% felt plenty challenging and enjoyable enough this time around. The best way to decide if a challenge is appropriate for you at any given time in your pregnancy: consider whether you feel excited and motivated or anxious and worried before you perform an exercise. Exercise is a resource that should empower you during pregnancy, and enjoyment is fundamental to that empowerment. Fill your active pregnancy toolkit accordingly!  

BUMP

Not only did my bump continue to grow quicker during my second trimester, but so too did everything else. My ribcage expanded. My hips broadened. That ‘tilted bowl’ pelvic shift I described in my first trimester overview became more pronounced and required extra attention to manage it both during and beyond my workouts. 

The clearest indication of change a-coming, that growing bump was integral to my early conversations with my daughter about how she might prepare to become a big sister. Talking about pregnancy with young toddlers feels bizarre when you still feel they’re your babies, but as I close in on the final weeks (maybe days!) of pregnancy I do feel that every conversation has helped to prepare us both. If anything, it has certainly helped me to ease any anxiety I have about becoming a mother to more than one child, and my ability to involve her in the journey ahead. 

We read books about becoming a big sister, re-read books about what it was like to bring her home (be warned: All The Things I Wish For You, personalised by Papier, is enough to push even the least hormonal mum-to-be over the emotional edge!) and introduced toys that simulate cuddling and feeding babies. All her favourite teddies have also had several nappy changes. Finally, I involved her in most of my fortnightly bump-date pictures and encouraged her to count the weeks, kiss the bump and speak to her little sisters.

TWIN TALK 

During a twin pregnancy, there is as much fascination with what’s happening inside the bump as there is with what’s happening to the bump itself. Extra monitoring is common practice to ensure that each baby is growing proportionately and not borrowing from the others’ resources – particularly in a monochorionic pregnancy where they share a single placenta. Here are some of the unique learnings I picked up during the second trimester of my twin pregnancy:  

• Nothing is a given. Twin pregnancy classifications can be difficult to ascertain – and any potential complications even less predictable. Because multiple pregnancies are still relatively rare, the stats and science to support them is far less conclusive than the research supporting single pregnancies. 
  • Ask your sonographers to explain the status of the amnion (or amnions) during each scan. Understanding the anatomy at work during your gestation will help you put scary terms like TTS (twin to twin transfusion) into context. Knowledge is power, so use your check-ups to aid your self-education.
  • That said, once you’ve had the reassurance you need at your scans, try to leave your fears at the hospital doors. Your body is a terrifically intuitive resource and will provide the most valuable insights into the progress of your pregnancy, so focus on what’s in front of you (or rather within you) and prioritise sensation over worry in the days and weeks between appointments.

• Eating for three requires mindful ingredient selection, not triple portions. There are many conflicting reports about how many extra calories you should eat to optimise a multiple pregnancy, but the most important consideration is how you feel. Your hunger is a highly reliable indication of when and how much you need to eat. 
  • If you are eating to fulfill your hunger, but you still feel low in energy, requesting extra blood tests for iron levels can help to rule out potential anaemia – a deficiency that is more common in expecting mums of multiples.

• Extra pelvic strain is normal, but that doesn’t mean you should ignore it. I found that unexpected coughs and sneezes could result in somewhat embarrassing leaks – not ideal when you work and live in leggings! 
  • I saw my post-natal women’s health physio for a pre-natal pelvic health assessment (I highly recommend following Jess @themamaphysio) and she reassured me that my pelvic floor was in fact stronger than it was in my last post-pregnancy check. She gave me some extra resources and training tips I put into practise so I could keep it that way despite the unpreventable extra strain on my pelvic organs.
  • Among the most useful I found was ‘the knack’, which involves exhaling and lifting your support muscles when you feel a sudden cough or sneeze coming.
  • Mix up your squeeze strategy. I tend to focus on engaging my pelvic floor on the exhale – particularly during weight training, which I outlined during my first trimester post. Jess also encouraged me to add some kegels on the inhale, or independently of the breath, to mirror the variety of circumstances when you’ll need to engage your pelvic floor in everyday life (like towing a tot on hip during the nursery run).
  • My point? Even if your pelvic health check is one of reassurance rather than revelation, there is always something you can do to improve your experience or retain more control of your pregnancy.

• Validate any advice that sits uncomfortably. I don’t mean to argue over everything your doctors tell you, but in twin pregnancies many pre-natal practitioners err heavily on the side of caution. This is of course a sensible approach to a multiples pregnancy, but it is essential that your care provider also considers your individual needs. Sometimes that requires you to be an active self-advocate and to voice those needs clearly. 
  • One example of this is a suspected weak cervix. You may be given extra cervical scanning or intervention to monitor risk of pre-term labour. Bed rest may be more frequently recommended for expecting mums of multiples. Whether you are advised to do anything extra, or to do less of something, always be sure you understand why your doctor has issued this advice. There may be alternatives or compromises that better meet your needs while still managing risks or optimising babies’ (and mum’s) wellbeing. 
  • I was recommended reduced activity soon into my third trimester (but it’s possible that you could be given similar advice in your second trimester) and I had very collaborative conversations with my doctor to ensure that he was on board with me continuing to swim – an activity that puts less weight on your cervix than climbing the stairs! Inactivity and muscle deconditioning can have adverse effects on your pregnancy, and your ability to rise to the physical demands of birthing and supporting twins, so finding a middleground that keeps you moving safely is an important consideration. You deserve to have your wellbeing respected, too. 

Skip to my third trimester blog post now. For more pre-natal wellness support, pick up your copy of Mind, Body, Bump today.

In an age in which we are beginning to understand the connection between mind and body – and to demand more from our fitness regimes as we try to crunch more benefits into less workout time – it’s little surprise that most disciplines are competing for the title of ‘best exercise for mental health’. But how do we crown a champion? Here’s a summary of the science-based arguments, an insight into my own mental health story, and my latest resource for working out to work in. 

What the science says – the body as a conduit to the mind  

Runners, cyclists, wild swimmers and adventurers fall back on ample evidence that more time in nature offers an improved state of mind. Yoga, Pilates and meditation enthusiasts champion breathwork for tapping into the parasympathetic nervous system to counteract the chronic stress epidemic responsible for the rise of anxiety and depression. While slates of studies in recent decades continue to put resistance training on top of the mental health food chain. The brain is a muscle, so it makes good sense that stimulating muscle growth can only serve to improve mental function and wellbeing. 

My personal love for the versatility and multi-disciplinary nature of resistance training makes me inclined to shout about reviews like this one published last year in the journal JAMA Psychology, which considered 33 randomised control trials and summarised that lifting weights just twice a week consistently reduced and managed symptoms of depression – regardless of the individual’s starting level of fitness. The benefits of doing substantially more were not substantially higher, so this review confirmed that mental health management via exercise is not a case of all or nothing, just the right kind of something. Better yet, the benefits stack up the moment you begin, regardless of how fit or skilled you are at the outset.  

The field of neuroplasticity supports strength training, too. The Brain That Changes Itself is a best-selling book that highlights amazing science and even more amazing stories showing how the way we think and behave continues to transform our brains throughout our lives. Through the constant creation of new neurological pathways, you can transfer your skills, master new ones, improve mental agility and rewire your mindset at any and every moment – every single thought paves the way for a similar thought and corresponding action to follow in its footsteps. The skill-building nature of strength training – through the introduction of new exercise progressions and variations – lends itself well to continual neurological progression and self-development through movement. And as each lift primes the body for a subsequent, easier lift, so too does each positive thought lend itself to more forthcoming positivity.  

What the heart says – my mind-body wellbeing story  

Sure, this new wave science is striking chords, but mental health is a human story, and I’d like to invite you into the story of my own human exploration of mental health via movement. 

First, a confession. While I’ve maintained a near-obsessive commitment to my physical health for as long as I can remember, I took a passive (at best) approach to my mental health – at times, I downright overlooked it. You see, I thought I was taking care of my mind by choosing exercise as my mental escape. In some senses, I suppose I was making a physiological investment in my main muscle. In recent weeks the media was shouting about the latest evidence proving exercise reduces or delays onset of dementia, after all. Yet, in pursuit of the PBs, I was literally trying to run further away from my emotional reality. The truth is: until about two years ago, I was scared beyond belief of my own mind. 

If I think back to when my fascination with exercise really began, it was during my early teenage years, when events in my life meant that standing still for long enough to experience my own feelings made me so uncomfortable I would chose to run, lift, swim and MOVE over facing my own emotional reality any and every time. Cue the beginning of an obsession that would later become a passionate career – but the foundations were seriously unstable. At that time, I wasn’t able to find the emotional support I needed as a young evolving human, and so my emotional maturity became stunted. Say what I felt? I didn’t have the self-awareness to know how I felt in order to express it, even if I could find a safe space to share. 

Instead, I gravitated towards coaching, and found I was creating a unique breed of mind training via strength training by encouraging my clients to reframe and make new mental connections through movement – a form of disguise and distraction from the disconnection in my own mind-body communication. It wasn’t until I approached my 30’s (nearly two decades into my well-practised habits of masking mental disconnection via physical rigour), when the responsibility of becoming a parent was triggering feelings of emotional abandonment in ways I could no longer out-train or ignore. The motivation to turn my attention inwards was suddenly far more urgent. I was a mother, and a role model to a new generation. 

I found a perinatal psychotherapist to help me hold space in my life to first revisit the emotional blocks in my past, and then set about doing the internal work to unpick what I now understand was a form of trauma in my life. Gradually, I became more aware of the generational triggers I had inherited, and how self-awareness and brain training could help me to avoid sharing these experiences with my own daughter. My survival strategies of the past two decades no longer suited me, but I needed some external accountability to help me knock down the robust walls I had built. Between therapy and a mindful shift in my own strength training practice, I shattered one brick at a time and started to see new foundations take shape. 

From my post-natal fitness recovery, I had learnt the power of the breath in re-sensitising the support muscles of the body during exercise. A regular practice of yoga, and some dabbling in meditation, had also taught me first-hand of the breath’s powerful effect on the parasympathetic nervous system – the support system of the body, with a hands-on role in mental wellbeing. Bringing this conscious breath into my weight training practice was the first means of combining my emotional work with my physical work. I could channel the calm I created through movement into improved awareness of my mental inner workings.

Further, through rep-by-rep declarations of personally meaningful, emotional affirmations, I could lay down new neural pathways to assure me I am strong, my vulnerability is my strength and proactive positive thinking does train my mind whilst I move my body. And I could do this work in the one hour I knew I would consistently set aside 3-4 times a week – a whole-body wellness solution that was a timely and necessary discovery in my personal development. 

What working in is all about 

There will continue to be arguments from all exercise camps claiming the best benefits for mental health. Ultimately, the best exercise for mental health is the one that makes you feel good, that is grounded in positive self-reflection and self-progression, and that encourages you to tune into your mind while you move. In some cases, exercise is one piece of the mental health puzzle that requires conscious integration with other psychological practices – such as I did with my psychotherapy. In some cases, it may be a powerful first step in your mental health journey. In any case, I do believe that a proactively emotional approach to movement stands to benefit absolutely everyone willing to do the work… by working OUT and working IN. 

I’m inviting everyone to experience a few essential work-in tools right away. Sign up to my newsletter here and you’ll receive my ‘Strength for Every Chapter’ e-book, complete with four simple practices to get you moving your body while taking ownership over your mental landscape. You’ll learn how to recognise strength as a quality of character every bit as mental as it is physical, and to express your inner strength through improved powers of observation, perseverance, compassion, and positivity.

I’ll leave you with a quote I’ve found particularly powerful during my own discovery of working in. Should you ever doubt the power of your own mind, and of your ability to train it as you train your body, know this: 

No two people see the external world in exactly the same way. To every separate person a thing is what he thinks it is – in other words, not a thing, but a think. 

Penelope Fitzgerald

Earlier this year I released my first book: Mind, Body, Bump; The Complete Plan for an Active Pregnancy. I am so proud of the resulting product and its empowering content, which takes a pregnancy-progressive approach to the language and mindset of ante-natal training and helps you to feel informed and excited about the unique challenges and opportunities of training for two. I joked that in the year of birthing my first daughter, I also wrote and birthed a book baby. So I am unbelievably grateful that in the same year of releasing this book, I get to participate alongside other Mind Body Bumpers and help to bring the content off the page with a real-time account of my second pregnancy: this time with very unexpected twins! Clearly they heard my post-natal message “Stronger Together” and took the mantra to heart. 

At 17 weeks today – with a bump nearly as big as my 24-week bump the first time around – I hope I’m in a position to highlight some of the highs and lows of my recent first trimester. What better way to summarise those whirlwind 12 weeks than with reference to the three pillars that define my pre-natal programme: the mind, the body and the (very big) bump! I’ll also touch on a few of the exceptional considerations for expectant mothers of multiples.  

MIND 

After having my daughter, Marnie, life changed so dramatically that I thought it would take some time before I felt ready to expand our family. Yet while the parenting learning curve is steep, it’s also rewarding and full of highs like no other. Possibly accelerated by the opportunity to coach strong mums alongside their beautiful babes as a post-natal personal trainer and a mum and baby fitness class instructor, the pangs of maternal longing kicked in a little sooner than expected. Lucky to conceive within weeks of trying again, my brain did remain a step behind my maternal instinct and the first few weeks of my pregnancy felt pretty much as surreal as they did the first time.  

It wasn’t until around 10 weeks when the reality of growing a human really set in. While travelling for work and personal reasons, I started experiencing regular migraines – a regular feature of my monthly cycle that thankfully disappeared during my first pregnancy. Worried these symptoms suggested a drop in the hormones estrogen and progesterone – which should be nothing but rising in the first trimester – I booked an early scan and went along with my husband, clutching his hand as everything within me wished for a healthy heartbeat. “Heartbeat is fine,” said the sonographer. “In fact, there’s two!”. 

Game. Changer. 

My initial reaction was to sob – heavily – for a solid five minutes. I’m pretty sure the monographer briefly considered the most direct route to the psych ward. Subsequent emotions in the days following the news included disbelief, denial, hilarity, excitement – the works. In short, this was not straightforward news to digest, and I went about easing my tumultuous mind the only way I know how: education, education, education. I had thought I would sail confidently through the emotions of early pregnancy, having done it once before, but the reality of words I myself had frequently uttered – “no one pregnancy is the same” – smacked me firmly in the face. 

It doesn’t matter how many times you’ve been around the merry-go-round, pregnancy can have surprising effects on both your mind and your body, so welcoming your feelings as they come rather than judging or critisising them really is the best way forward. Fast-forward 7 weeks and I’ve not only accepted that I have twins on the way, but I’m fully on board with them being on board. I have even made some brilliant twin mama friendships and I feel heard, reassured and supported during this transition. 

Reading books such as The Holistic Guide to Twin Pregnancy also helped me feel productive and in control during a time when I felt things were happening to me rather than by me – a pretty universal feeling during every pregnancy. For a single pregnancy or otherwise, I also recommend Milli Hill’s maternally-minded books The Positive Birth Book and Give Birth Like a Feminist, which help you take ownership over your pregnancy and labour. Week-by-week tracking apps like Pregnancy + will also give you bite-sized, real-time updates you can digest as your pregnancy progresses. Mind, Body, Bump also offers trimester overviews like the extract below, plus month-by-month updates. 

BODY

While the nausea was a little worse the second time, I found it manageable with regular snacking and light exercise. I did feel more light-headed in the first trimester, which I now know is likely due to the additional increase in blood volume that you experience with a multiple pregnancy, and the initial vascular underfill or low blood pressure caused by your blood vessels dilating in anticipation of this major physiological change. I adapted exercises by reducing impact, minimising overhead lifting and choosing more stable movements on two feet over single-leg exercises like lunges or unsupported step-ups. 

BUMP

My bump did show earlier than it did in my first pregnancy, but what was even more noticeable was the sudden increase in pelvic pressure. With the weight of two babies and two placentas (my pregnancy is diamniotic, dichorionic, for those of you twin mamas reading!), the strain on my pelvic floor was greater and more sudden from the early weeks of pregnancy. 

This sudden shift in pressure also resulted in an extra anterior tilt on my pelvis – imagine a full bowl of water tilting forward, so water spills over the front, rather than neutral, so the water balances carefully along its edges. Cue more sensations in my lower back. These changes are also common in many second pregnancies, or even in first pregnancies where babe grows more quickly or the amniotic sack contains more fluid. 

I responded to these early niggles (lovingly nicknamed ‘sciatic-ouch’) by reducing impact activities (no jogging, despite feeling up to light running until five months into my first pregnancy) and focusing on exercises that strengthen my glutes and my deep-set transverse abdominals to help stabilise a more vulnerable lumbar spine. More stable variations of unilateral exercises, which work one side of the body at a time, also help to reinforce healthy communication between the pelvis and spine. Try bridges, deadlifts and squats in ‘B Stance’, which challenges one side of the body more than the other, but while keeping two feet on the ground. Single arm rows and paloff presses are excellent unilateral exercises for the upper body, helping to gently encourage an active, balanced core.

TWIN TALK 

I’ve mentioned some of the unique considerations of a twin pregnancy in the pillars above, but, in summary, the most notable differences I found in the first trimester include: 

• Feelings of overwhelm or ineptitude to deal with the unexpected challenges of a twin pregnancy, extra considerations regarding labour and the uncertainty about life post-delivery. 
  • My best advice is to make connections with other twin mums and expectant twin mums as early as possible. It is an extremely supportive community and you’ll feel like you’ve already earned an extra-special “super-mum” badge by joining it.

• Increased stress on the pelvic floor. 
  • Start your daily kegel exercises as early as possible, and be particularly mindful to incorporate the support muscles including your pelvic floor and transverse abs during your workouts. As you exhale, you can visualise rolling and scooping the ‘four corners’ of your pelvic opening (back, front and sides) and gently belt-buckling your core so your lower tummy hugs up and in. Do this as you rise up from a squat, lunge or deadlift and during the phase of any exercise that requires the most effort. 
  • NICE guidelines advise expectant twin mums are referred to pelvic health physiotherapists during their pregnancies. If you do feel uncomfortable heaviness or experience leaking, ask your GP for a referral or your health insurer to fund an appointment. The reassurance that you’re correctly engaging your pelvic floor is infinitely useful biofeedback during the early stages of your pre-natal training. 

• Extra hormonal symptoms such as nausea, dizziness and joint pain. 
  • Listen to your body and hold yourself accountable only to the sensations you’re currently experiencing – not to any standard set by others, or by yourself in earlier pregnancies. 
  • If you feel the need to pull back on impact or simplify movements, do that now. The extra surge of relaxin in your body will destabilise your joints earlier and more dramatically, while a physiological drop in blood pressure may throw you off-balance in the early weeks. Think of these modifications as pregnancy-progressive with enhanced benefits for you and your babies rather than regressions that reflect a reduced physical ability. 

• Frequent hunger or low blood sugar.
  • If you feel the need to eat more, do that now. Your body’s nutritional demands are much higher during a twin pregnancy – particularly as multiple babies’ absorb even more of your essential vitamins and minerals like iron, calcium and magnesium. Eating first thing in the morning and more frequently throughout the day are good habits to help you stave off quick-fix cravings induced by low blood sugar and make more considered, healthier choices from the outset.  
  • Advice is inconsistent regarding additional folic acid intake; I read around and decided to double my intake to 800mcg, but seek advice from your GP or midwives. 
  • Where possible, include proteins and healthy fats in each meal to prioritise the heavyweight nutrients over less substantial filler foods. You’ll need all the energy you can get, so carbs still play a role too, but try to focus on unrefined carbs that will go the distance over quick fixes. Extra fibre from eating lots of veg and fruit will help reduce any unwanted ‘relaxing’ of the digestive tract thanks to the influx of relaxin, too! 

Skip to my trimester two blog post now. For more pre-natal wellness support, pick up your copy of Mind, Body, Bump today.

If you’ve read the first two instalments of this series, you’ll have hopefully begun to understand the precious balance of moving your body and giving yourself the time and space to be moved. Of course, having purpose is one of the most integral ways to feel moved and to get moving in a direction that serves us: forward. Cue the final pillar of our series. Together with energy, presence and purpose, I hope my final four tips move you (and us, as motherkind) to move forward into a strong and happy future.  

MOVE FORWARD, MAMA

-1- Fulfil your obligation to the next generation of mothers.

It’s time we move on from post-natal language like bouncing back to more productive conversations about moving forward.

I’m going to take this early opportunity to say, for the record, that fitting into our pre-baby jeans is the least appropriate validation of our post-natal wellbeing. Seriously, your body shape-shifts during pregnancy and labour in a way that no denim designer can anticipate. Your organs may never settle in their original place – you just can’t beat the physiology, and there are far healthier and more compelling goals to aspire to than a restrictive waistband. You can be stronger and even leaner than ever but those skinny jeans will still look and feel shit because they’re not right for your new body. To self-flagellate with any item in your wardrobe is nonsense. Please stop it, and get some new clothes that make you feel like the rockstar mother, human being and resident of your superhuman body that you are.

Our present day language, actions and community will set a precedent for the next generation of mothers, and it’s only by choosing to swerve societal pressures that the wider conversation will follow suit. Let’s stop striving for a pre-baby ideal and look instead to a stronger tomorrow. Let’s ditch the skin-deep evaluations and learn to appreciate the depth of our value. 

-2- Get Stronger Together.

While we reprogramme the way we talk to ourselves, let’s also reflect on the way we talk to each other. When support and celebration replaces the language of comparison and degradation, we pay forward a revelation in post-natal progress through every message we vocally or silently send, every hug we offer, and through every example we set together. 

-3- Move your mantra.

Rehearse positive thinking, positive modelling and self-kindness. The more you do this – and the more you see the results – the less you’ll feel the need to compare yourself to others or to wider societal standards (which no one really feels they’re fulfilling). When you begin to see comparison or self-flagellation as an obstacle to your progress, your motivation to think and act differently will become more attainable. Choose a mantra that really resonates with you, and repeat it to yourself as you do your exercise. This works particularly well for yoga or mobility flows or strength training workouts. One rep or one movement = one full internalisation of your mantra. Here are a few of my favourites to help you brainstorm your own: 

• My worth is mine to give
• My strength is my gift to others
• Challenge moves me forward

-4- Your baby’s building blocks are genius.

One of the first concepts your baby learns is about patterns. Blocks sit atop of other blocks, not hovering in space with no foundation. So when did we, as grown-ups, get so ahead of ourselves setting targets with no respect for foundations?

I encourage you to join baby on his or her learning journey as you play together. Lay your foundation of blocks. Reinforce that foundation with support – in terms of movement, think different variations of exercises to test your body before you add weight or impact. Stack each subsequent cube carefully – but confidently, because you’ve bypassed guestimation in favour of a true foundation. Remember that some layers take longer to set than others. The slowing of progress is not necessarily a plateau, but instead a process of patience and respect for your achievement. Be more kid – learn through play, and remember that towers don’t rise taller by sitting on air.  

Thank you for following this series. I will soon be releasing an e-book on Strength Through Every Chapter, with more tools to specifically help you feel moved by the exercise you move to and to see its effects resonate through all areas of your life. To receive the e-book, join the Fit Brit Collective newsletter today. 

Scroll back to posts preceding this and you’ll see nearly two years have passed. As it happens, I was also expecting my first baby. Put two and two together and you can probably guess some of the challenges I’ve been tackling between then and now. And tackle them I have. Rarely ‘by the book’. Not always with the self-assurance I tried to project on the surface. Often inefficiently. Always imperfectly. But in the process of the tackling I’ve done more learning than I ever anticipated, and I’m conscious that some of what I’ve learned could help other new mums who are finding their feet – and finding the best ways to get them moving again! 

This post will be the first in a series of three, all offering four ways to help you in your pursuit to: 

• GET MOVING;
• BE MOVED; and 
• MOVE FORWARD. 

I’ll be casting the net slightly further than a simple list of suggestions for incorporating exercise into your new routine (or lackthereof) as a parent. I think reducing the role of exercise to yet another entry on your rolling to-do list does it a serious disservice. Parenthood itself is a powerful experience that can re-set your relationship to movement, your ability and willingness to be moved and your integrated approach to moving forward in all aspects of your life. After all, without being moved or moving forward, exercise is just an act of going through the motions. When we give it purpose, and we see how its effects exceed our own physicality, that’s when it sticks. So, let’s move forward… 

GET MOVING, MAMA

-1- There will never be the perfect time to exercise, or the perfect set of circumstances jumping up and down telling you “Now! Now! Now is your opportunity!”.

It’s up to you to create those opportunities. They start by putting down the laundry. Leaving the playmat and toys where they are (they look good there on the floor, promise). Confronting any guilt about putting yourself first and just bloody giving your body some love.

-2- Prioritising your strength and wellbeing is not selfish.

Consider for a moment how the following will resonate positively with your children: 

• your pain-free ability to lift and carry them; 
• your confidence running after them (leak-free) when they take those first steps; 
• your personal fulfillment at the end of the day because, for at least a few moments of that day, you were able to address your own needs.

Babies and little children sponge up all our energy, so fuelling your own joy and strength will spread positivity by parental osmosis.

-3- Strength starts from the inside out – and, ideally, with an internal examination by a women’s health physio.

While frustrating in the early days, the post-natal need to re-train the once-automatic connection of your pelvic floor and core (what I will furthermore refer to as your support muscles) is an incredible resource for bringing more respect, understanding and power to everything from lifting your children to participating in your favourite form of exercise. GPs can refer you through the NHS or you can book privately. Many women’s health physios offer home visits you can fit it in around your family commitments, it’s no more invasive or uncomfortable than a smear test and it offers you valuable biofeedback that will give clear purpose and assurance during your return to exercise.

-4- Use your resistance as rocket fuel.

It’s natural to fear challenge or discomfort, but the resistance we feel towards exercise is an essential part of the overcoming. The endorphins and pride that rush in at the end of a session is all the more powerful when we perhaps didn’t want to do the work at the outset. In fact, beating the odds will be the very thing that makes you feel like super-mum and inspires you to chase those super-mum feelings again! 

While none of us lives or moves without resistance, there are some simple tricks to swerve easy obstacles at the outset:

• Where possible, put on your activewear in the morning. 
• Keep an exercise mat in the room you spend the most time (if it’s an arm’s reach from your sofa or desk, you can ‘snack’ on five minutes of movement throughout the day). 
• Have a plan in place – perhaps designed by a physio or post-natal PT, or through a subscription to online post-natal classes. 
• When the plan doesn’t go to plan, improvise. Baby wouldn’t sleep? Pop them in the bouncer or in a sling and do your workout, anyway. Do 10 minutes instead of a half hour – it really is better than nothing. On my Instagram feed you’ll find a load of workouts you can do while including your littles! 
• Remember point one – perfection can only be a hindrance to your progress. You’re doing bloody brilliantly, mama!

Next on the blog: 4 ways to BE MOVED as a new mum